Big Idea Daily | Transcend
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The New Science of Self-Actualizationby Scott Barry Kaufman |
“What a man can be, he must be. He must be true to his own nature. This need we may call self-actualization.”ABRAHAM MASLOW |
BIG IDEA
A New Metaphor
FROM THE BOOK“The pyramid from the sixties told a story that Maslow never meant to tell; a story of achievement, of mastering level by level until you ‘won’ the game of life.
But that is most definitely not the spirit of self-actualization that the humanistic psychologists emphasized. The human condition isn’t a competition; it’s an experience. Life isn’t a trek up a summit but a journey to travel through—a vast blue ocean, full of new opportunities for meaning and discovery but also danger and uncertainty. In this choppy surf, a clunky pyramid is of little use. Instead, what is needed is something a bit more functional. We’ll need a sailboat.”
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Brian's Notes
That’s from the Introduction: “A New Hierarchy of Needs.”β
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First, you need to know that Maslow NEVER (!) dropped his hierarchy of needs into a pyramid. Apparently, that first appeared in a management textbook when an editor decided to illustrate it in a pyramid.
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Scott walks us through why the pyramid never made sense AND how Maslow never would have supported that representation of his life’s work. Then he shares a new metaphor of how our needs play together: A SAILBOAT—which has two components: A hull and a sail.
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The “hull” of our sailboat represents our Security needs. These are things we need to make sure we’re paying attention to lest we sink before we really get going on our Heroic quests across the beautiful blue oceans of the world. These Security needs include Safety, Connection, and Self-Esteem.
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Once the hull of our sailboat is secure, we’re ready to open the metaphorical sails. The “sail” of our sailboat represents our Growth needs. These are the qualities we use to navigate those open waters as we go out on one adventure after another. These Growth needs include Exploration, Love, and Purpose.
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Scott tells us that all these needs are in a constant state of dynamic integration. It’s not like a video game where you go from level to level one after the other. It’s WAY more dynamic than that. We’re ALWAYS in a state of becoming.
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Scott ends this chapter by saying: “The vision of a good life I present in this book isn’t one that is typically touted these days. It’s not one where the primary motivation is money, power, social status, or even happiness. Instead, the good life that I present, which is deeply grounded in the core principles of humanistic psychology and a realistic understanding of human needs, is about the healthy expression of needs in the service of discovering and expressing a self that works best for you.”
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He continues by saying: “The good life is not something you will ever achieve. It’s a way of living. As Carl Rogers noted, ‘The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction, not a destination.’ This process won’t always bring feelings of happiness, contentment, and bliss, and it may even sometimes cause pain and heartache. It’s not for the ‘faint-hearted,’ as Rogers notes, as it requires continually stretching outside your comfort zone as you realize more and more of your potentialities and launch yourself ‘fully into the stream of life.’ Just like it takes courage to open your sail on a sailboat and see where the winds will take you, it takes a lot of courage to become the best version of yourself.
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Nevertheless, if you stick with it, you are sure to live a richer life, one that is characterized by adjectives such as ‘enriching,’ ‘exciting,’ ‘rewarding,’ ‘challenging,’ ‘creative,’ ‘meaningful,’ intense,’ and ‘awe-inspiring.’ I believe in the fundamental capacity of humans for growth. No matter your current personality or circumstance, I believe this book can help you grow in precisely the direction you truly want to grow, in your own style, and in such a way that allows you to show the universe that you really existed, and benefited others, while you were here. Let’s begin the process of becoming.”
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As I typed out that passage—longer than most I typically share, I was struck by JUST how good of a book this is. If you’re at all interested in understanding the science of activating and actualizing your potential, you should read it. It will help you be your best self AND it will help your kids, grandkids, colleagues and loved ones do the same. (Get it.)
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As I typed that out, I ALSO thought of another one of my favorite people/teachers: Tal Ben-Shahar. In his great book, The Pursuit of Perfect, Tal helps us Conquer Perfectionism. He leans on the same Carl Rogers quote as he tells us: “The optimalism ideal is not a distant shore to be reached but a distant star that guides us and can never be reached. As Carl Rogers pointed out, ‘The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction, not a destination.’”
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I love that the two of them reference the same wisdom for so many reasons. May we hop in our sailboats, ensure the hull is secure, and open the sails—using our ideals as distant stars to navigate those blue oceans on our next Heroic adventure.
Big Ideas
01: A NEW METAPHOR
02: SELF-ACTUALIZATION
03: EXPLORATION
04: PURPOSE
05: TRANSCENDENCE
“Maslow never actually created a pyramid to represent his hierarchy of needs.”SCOTT BARRY KAUFMAN |
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